Change. The word itself makes some of us want to turn around ... and run away. Change, whether imposed or willed, is difficult for many of us. Deep in the core of our beings, we long to fulfill some destiny, but sometimes the actual steps required may be more daunting than we initially thought they would be. You must remember that you are the master of your own destiny ~ anything that you long for can most definitely happen!
The trick is, you have to allow the changes to occur. And sometimes, on rare occasion, you have to be the enforcer of the change. It is okay to turn your back on a path you are walking, even if it is just to look over your shoulder with a longing glance towards yesterday. Or to a time you felt was flowing more smoothly. It is okay to change your mind about something when it is not becoming exactly what you thought it would be. Sure, there are times when it isn't possible to quit or slow down, and you may not want to ~ those times should be honoured ~ maybe there is a lesson there. But when something is feeling complicated or difficult, or if you keep coming up against obstacles, it is okay to try something different. Perhaps there is another area of your life that needs attention ... Perhaps your energy would be better spent on something that is constantly nagging at you: Exercise, schooling, laughing, meditating, doing yoga, going for long walks ... Perhaps all that you need is a momentary break to figure out some nagging details of a recent venture. Then maybe it will be possible to continue on the path you were on, with ease, joy, and love. The flowing river of life.
Whatever decisions you make in your life will never be considered mistakes in the end. Look at your life as a meandering journey filled up with as much experience as you can pack into it. Take chances. Take breaks. Be in love with yourself. Be in love with the whole world. Try something new, and then rest if you can. Reflect on your life, daily. Be grateful for all that you have. Live your life in a balanced way ~ Make sure that you feel at peace sometimes. And above all, don't be so hard on yourself. You are the master of your own destiny.
Showing posts with label change. Show all posts
Showing posts with label change. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Saturday, June 5, 2010
The Dark Side of Change
When it comes to writing, I have a bad habit of only writing when I feel balanced. In this moment, I am going through a transformation … one that is feeling quite large and a bit unmanageable right now. I find that resisting the transformation was making it incredibly more difficult to deal with. I am now trying to allow the process to unfold without interfering. Some days I’m not sure if I can be strong enough to face the dark side of my spirituality – the side that shapeshifts, that turns everything I know out of me, changing my perceptions forever. How can I simply accept the fact that I am being changed forever, that everything that makes me who I am will be gone?
Well, perhaps not everything about me will change … but that is the hard part – not knowing what to expect.
For three years, I have been asking for freedom from anxiety, for direction in my life once the kids go to school, and for clarity of my life’s purpose. I’m beginning to think that my life’s purpose is just to live it, and that thought honestly makes me feel a little disappointed. Aren’t I meant to do something Big? Aren’t I meant to change peoples’ lives? Aren’t I meant to feel peace and harmony once I find this “life’s purpose”? For the most part of this period of discomfort I am going through, I have tossed my hands in the air asking, “What’s the point? What’s the point of being spiritual? What’s the point of trying so hard and I am seemingly getting Nowhere?”
The only one of my beliefs that seems to be sticking for me right now is one that my mother taught me when I was very young: The Golden Rule ~ Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Be nice to people. Give them something of yourself – a smile, a hand on the shoulder, a laugh. That gentle consideration of others that is often lacking in our world, because of insecurity, fear, weakness.
What began this transformation was, of course, the Sound Healing workshop I attended a few weeks ago. After the workshop was over, I felt compelled to thank Danielea ~ I didn’t know what I was thanking her for, and I still don’t. After a few days, I think I realized that I was only at the beginning of something much larger, and the darkness set in pretty quickly. It was only a few days ago that I finally asked for guidance, ending my resistance to this change. I pulled one of the Mayan Oracle Cards and was blown away by what I chose. CAUAC - You are entering into a time of profound quickening and transformation . You have come to the edge of what you have known yourself to be. Cauac beckons you to step into a fire that changes every level of your being, even the underlying structures of your life. Step into the unknown - your metamorphosis has begun!
I am finding it incredibly challenging to write about this at a time where I have no resolution or reason for the emotions I’m feeling. But perhaps that is part of the process of change ... for me, there is no better way to own up to how I'm feeling than writing on this blog.
If anyone else has stories of transformation, I would love to hear them ... I am asking for guidance and help with all of this, because I feel incredibly overwhelmed right now.
In Gratitude ~ Nicole
The only one of my beliefs that seems to be sticking for me right now is one that my mother taught me when I was very young: The Golden Rule ~ Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Be nice to people. Give them something of yourself – a smile, a hand on the shoulder, a laugh. That gentle consideration of others that is often lacking in our world, because of insecurity, fear, weakness.
What began this transformation was, of course, the Sound Healing workshop I attended a few weeks ago. After the workshop was over, I felt compelled to thank Danielea ~ I didn’t know what I was thanking her for, and I still don’t. After a few days, I think I realized that I was only at the beginning of something much larger, and the darkness set in pretty quickly. It was only a few days ago that I finally asked for guidance, ending my resistance to this change. I pulled one of the Mayan Oracle Cards and was blown away by what I chose. CAUAC - You are entering into a time of profound quickening and transformation . You have come to the edge of what you have known yourself to be. Cauac beckons you to step into a fire that changes every level of your being, even the underlying structures of your life. Step into the unknown - your metamorphosis has begun!
I am finding it incredibly challenging to write about this at a time where I have no resolution or reason for the emotions I’m feeling. But perhaps that is part of the process of change ... for me, there is no better way to own up to how I'm feeling than writing on this blog.
If anyone else has stories of transformation, I would love to hear them ... I am asking for guidance and help with all of this, because I feel incredibly overwhelmed right now.
In Gratitude ~ Nicole
Friday, May 14, 2010
Creating Change
There is something I need to learn about stagnancy. It seems as though everyone and everything around me is moving, doing, taking action. I feel as though I am in the eye of the storm where all is calm and still, yet just outside of this tiny world I'm in, there is a perfect chaos taking over. A chaos understood, and even planned by our beautiful Universe.
People come in and out of my life, teaching me, embracing what I have to offer, and then some of them leave. Some of the people I've met since I moved here have been exceptional, phenomenal people. People who I grew to love and accept wholly into my life as dear dear friends. Friendships that will last the rest of our lives. Please don't misunderstand ~ I am not complaining, or feeling sorry for myself. I am just trying to embrace the situation that is consistently being presented to me in this place.
Quesnel is an interesting place. What I've noticed is that the people who move here are confronted by what they first perceive as a wall ~ a wall of judgement and ... almost .... persecution. It is a stigma that is often laid upon small towns that is sometimes deserved, and sometimes not. Quesnel is not what it appears to be on the surface. There are many many people here searching for something so much bigger. Inevitably there are always comments about how in a town like this, we can't expect to have a worldly frame of mind, because anything "different" will get you stoned or cast out. As outsiders, we perpetuate that story, allowing it to partially dictate what we do, what we say and how we act while living here. The best thing that a person can do is to be themselves, speak freely, and offer their knowledge and previous experiences to the collective. Everything changes, we all change, we all move in, move on, move up, and move out. When you not only embrace change, but make change, you are truly servicing your community.
Next month marks our fourth year living in Quesnel, and it is amazing to me how much this place has challenged and changed me. What I have come to realize in the past year is that Quesnel, and perhaps any place, is truly a blank canvas. I can have access to anything I want here ... but it is up to me to publicly announce what I would like to see ... and at times I have been the one to add something new to the community. I have had to step out of my personal comfort zone, roll up my sleeves and start a Mom to Mom Support Group. I have told strangers about my postpartum anxiety. My friend and I have put on workshops about spirituality ~ this was something that pushed me immediately outside of my comfort zone. But those workshops represented something larger than us ... I see now that more and more energy is building for spirituality, creative expression, yoga, sound healing and more. It is amazing to see the changes that are taking place, and I am honoured to witness them.
One of the rewards of living in a small town is that you have the opportunity to help build a foundation that gives a place its' character. For me personally, I am working on making peace with the stagnancy that I am being challenged with. I sometimes feel as though I am firmly rooted here, with no thoughts to leave, and if I can embrace my groundedness, I can be a very strong support for others. Perhaps I am a bridge for many people, a connection, a safe passage through a challenging situation. And that is something I believe I can enjoy offering to those kindred spirits who weave in and out of my life.
With Gratitude, Nicole
People come in and out of my life, teaching me, embracing what I have to offer, and then some of them leave. Some of the people I've met since I moved here have been exceptional, phenomenal people. People who I grew to love and accept wholly into my life as dear dear friends. Friendships that will last the rest of our lives. Please don't misunderstand ~ I am not complaining, or feeling sorry for myself. I am just trying to embrace the situation that is consistently being presented to me in this place.
Quesnel is an interesting place. What I've noticed is that the people who move here are confronted by what they first perceive as a wall ~ a wall of judgement and ... almost .... persecution. It is a stigma that is often laid upon small towns that is sometimes deserved, and sometimes not. Quesnel is not what it appears to be on the surface. There are many many people here searching for something so much bigger. Inevitably there are always comments about how in a town like this, we can't expect to have a worldly frame of mind, because anything "different" will get you stoned or cast out. As outsiders, we perpetuate that story, allowing it to partially dictate what we do, what we say and how we act while living here. The best thing that a person can do is to be themselves, speak freely, and offer their knowledge and previous experiences to the collective. Everything changes, we all change, we all move in, move on, move up, and move out. When you not only embrace change, but make change, you are truly servicing your community.
Next month marks our fourth year living in Quesnel, and it is amazing to me how much this place has challenged and changed me. What I have come to realize in the past year is that Quesnel, and perhaps any place, is truly a blank canvas. I can have access to anything I want here ... but it is up to me to publicly announce what I would like to see ... and at times I have been the one to add something new to the community. I have had to step out of my personal comfort zone, roll up my sleeves and start a Mom to Mom Support Group. I have told strangers about my postpartum anxiety. My friend and I have put on workshops about spirituality ~ this was something that pushed me immediately outside of my comfort zone. But those workshops represented something larger than us ... I see now that more and more energy is building for spirituality, creative expression, yoga, sound healing and more. It is amazing to see the changes that are taking place, and I am honoured to witness them.
One of the rewards of living in a small town is that you have the opportunity to help build a foundation that gives a place its' character. For me personally, I am working on making peace with the stagnancy that I am being challenged with. I sometimes feel as though I am firmly rooted here, with no thoughts to leave, and if I can embrace my groundedness, I can be a very strong support for others. Perhaps I am a bridge for many people, a connection, a safe passage through a challenging situation. And that is something I believe I can enjoy offering to those kindred spirits who weave in and out of my life.
With Gratitude, Nicole
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Ch-Ch-Changes ...
I can feel the earth preparing for the change from summer to fall ... It is still warm outside and the sun still shines, but on occasion I can feel a subtle chill in the air. I love fall. It is the time of year that I was born, and I've always felt connected to this precious season. It is a time of excitement, of newness, and a time of raw possibility. Perhaps that is why I'm feeling restless, concerned and introverted as of late. I feel better when I am looking forward. I feel the best when I am living in the immediate moment.
I wonder what this new year will bring? It seems as though many people are feeling some tumult right now, almost in anticipation of some radical changes. I have been cowering these past few weeks, unsure of what changes are coming, but now I am ready to emerge. I am ready to embrace whatever comes my way. I am ready to create something bigger.
Just as the earth has her annual phases, we do too. Are you prepared to shed the leaves of your former self in order to save your energy for a season of silence? For that is what Winter can bring. It seems strange to be thinking about winter's approach, but I'm going to prepare myself this year. Winter came way too quickly last year, and I am going to be ready! To me, winter is a season of creativity. The darkness helps us to focus on what is directly in front of us. It is important to gather energy now in order to deal with this. Picture yourself as a squirrel gathering bits of food, information and energy. Enjoy these last days of summer, because they are fleeting! Get outside in the sunshine as much as you possibly can - run through your sprinkler, man, because there's not a lot of time left!!
I am preparing for Change. I am readying for what I do not know. I will be prepared.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Leaf of Change
I am slowly turning over a leaf of change. I feel as though I had emptied myself out, and I wasn't sure what to do. My Uncle gave me some sage advice. He said that we do need to search sometimes in order to remain connected to the divine source, because without this reassurance we can feel lost. He said to be very aware of the ego at this time, and to ask for space to simply Be, without Ego. I have already had a few opportunities to test myself, and I am feeling very pure right now.
I have been meditating more, and even did a bit of yoga last night, after a long run. I am trying to fill myself up with all good things. I am feeling strangely disciplined as of late ... I am trying not to make assumptions as to where this transition could lead to.
I would just like to enjoy every moment. To truly notice each situation for what is really is. To keep that Ego in check.
Friday, January 2, 2009
Taking Control of Your Life
I am feeling inspired about the direction my life is taking. Life isn't "happening" to me anymore. I am making my life happen, and I am becoming the person I've always wanted to be. I am a beautiful, insightful, kind, loving and positive woman. The only one who ever held me back was myself, and now I'm ready to take a chance and make change. With great risk comes great reward.
In the past, I allowed my inner voice to become too loud ... My insecurities were holding me back from the things I really wanted in my life. I remember the day I began to take charge. I was venting about a recent breakup, and I started telling my compassionate listener what my next boyfriend would be like. He would have to be cute, and have big arms to wrap around me, have the ability to help keep me safe, be a great listener, I even stated the colour of his hair ... and it also wouldn't hurt if he was a wrestler.
The universe gave me this man. All I had to do was ask.
After getting married and having kids there hasn't been much on my list. But I am ready to start thinking about what I really want out of my life. I want the good stuff. I don't want to be at the conclusion of my life with regrets about the things I didn't do, or how I didn't put myself out there because I thought people might not like me. I am living now, and it feels fantastic! My blog has become such a bright light for me, and hopefully for others. I am ready to offer my support to women, mothers who are having a tough time like I did, not so long ago. I am planting seeds for my own business, and I am so excited to begin.
2009 is going to be a great year for me, and the ones I love.
2009 is going to be a great year for you too, and I am so excited for you!
In the past, I allowed my inner voice to become too loud ... My insecurities were holding me back from the things I really wanted in my life. I remember the day I began to take charge. I was venting about a recent breakup, and I started telling my compassionate listener what my next boyfriend would be like. He would have to be cute, and have big arms to wrap around me, have the ability to help keep me safe, be a great listener, I even stated the colour of his hair ... and it also wouldn't hurt if he was a wrestler.
The universe gave me this man. All I had to do was ask.
After getting married and having kids there hasn't been much on my list. But I am ready to start thinking about what I really want out of my life. I want the good stuff. I don't want to be at the conclusion of my life with regrets about the things I didn't do, or how I didn't put myself out there because I thought people might not like me. I am living now, and it feels fantastic! My blog has become such a bright light for me, and hopefully for others. I am ready to offer my support to women, mothers who are having a tough time like I did, not so long ago. I am planting seeds for my own business, and I am so excited to begin.
2009 is going to be a great year for me, and the ones I love.
2009 is going to be a great year for you too, and I am so excited for you!
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