Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Seasons and Sabbats

There is a very deep and distinct connection to nature that we as humans, every one of us, possess. Whether you are religious or not, you probably notice that you feel a certain way at certain times of the year. When Spring is on it’s way, there is a feeling of hope, renewal and joy. Have you recognized the feeling you get when the leaves are falling off the trees and the warm glow of summer is slowly waning away? We all sense that Fall is a time of renewal, a time to sow seeds for the distant Spring, and to get ourselves ready for the encroaching Winter.

These things seem obvious, perhaps even trivial to some, but I see a cycle in all of it. I’m not talking about the obvious cycle of the four seasons, but the cycle of my own life.

Nature-based religions recognize eight sabbats throughout the year. If you look into it, each sabbat reflects the inner workings of our own selves. Nature is a reflection of you.

Observing the Sabbats is an extremely effective way to observe the mechanics of your life. You can use these auspicious times of the year to check in with your dreams and goals, but more especially the present moment. If you can be prepared and know that you usually feel some sadness in the dark months of the year, you’ll be better prepared to deal with the sadness, to set some things up as a defensive measure or a precaution. You can also begin to observe your thoughts – perhaps you always think of taking a trip in February, but you never make the call to your travel agent. Or maybe every September you yearn to try something new – take a course or start swimming!

The more aware you are of your life, and the more you are doing to constantly improve it, the better your life is going to be! You can start really thinking about what you want to do within the next year of your life. As a society, we become so wrapped up in the fast pace that we often forget that our lives are accumulating more quickly than we’d like. Even if you only take a few minutes to observe your self and your situation, the point is that it’s a commitment to yourself. It is a commitment to constantly grow and learn, to take risks and even to fail. Perhaps the most difficult part of this is having to truly reflect on the current state of your life. We all work hard to be good people, to make enough money, to feel secure and to stay healthy physically. But do we work hard at really taking care of ourselves? Can you honestly say that you’ve been good to yourself, have taken alone time for yourself, have indulged a little to celebrate your life? During the Sabbats I like to sit quietly and become the observer of my thoughts. Sometimes I question my thoughts, especially the ones rooted in fear. When you become aware of your thoughts in this way, you can begin to control your thoughts.

Nature is a reflection of you , and you are a reflection of the Universe. If you are a reflection of the Universe, then you are also in charge of your destiny. You are the Creator. So take charge, in whatever way makes sense to you and GO for it!

Monday, February 23, 2009

My Cat Chance

I've never had to, in my adult life, let go of a household pet. My cat, Chance, has been around for close to 14 years and is more than a pet to me. Today is the sad sad day that I have to let her go. Deep inside, I know that she will be at peace. Deep inside I know she'll be going back into the "melting pot" of pure divine energy, and of unconditional love.

But I am going to miss her, and I am so sad that I have to let her go from my life. I always joked that she was so demanding of my attention, that she'd probably come back to haunt me.

She has been deteriorating for a few months now. It's all happened rather quickly, and I'm glad for her sake. But she is suffering now. I can't stand to think about her being in pain. Her hind legs are hurting her so much that she can't even jump onto a chair anymore. She was once able to jump six feet into the air.

Chance unnerves me. She used to sit in front of me and stare at me for as long as I'd let her. She was seeing the real me, always, without judgement. She has always looked at me with love. I think that in my reflections, there is a lot I will learn from Chance.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Be the Universe

Staying on the right track isn't always easy. I find that my spirituality waxes and wanes ... I'm talking about that deep and powerful connection with the Universe, when your path speaks to you, and you feel completely certain about the direction your life is heading.

I feel like I'm on a constant quest to keep my faith alive. Some days I feel wise beyond my years, other days I feel like a brand new soul discovering the meaningful events in my life. I don't wish for the certainty of wisdom, because I know that would signal the end of this life. I try to imagine myself as the cosmos - huge, all-knowing, all-seeing - I am the Universe, yearning to experience something new. I am creating every moment. If I truly believe that, then I can only experience happiness. If I am certain that my faith and knowledge will wane tomorrow, I MUST live in the moment today! I must immerse myself in every second of every day, and I know that is when I'll be truly happy. Because I will truly be the Universe, fulfilling my desires.

Monday, February 9, 2009


When the clouds fall down to the trees and the whole world gets quiet,
I know the snow is about to blanket us in it's purity.

Today the snowflakes fell so gently,
Floating, dancing, weaving their way to the white ground,
And I thought of nothing at all.

My mind was at peace, and so was my soul.
And I am so grateful.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

It is Possible

I am feeling so excited and happy about the support group! I am so grateful to be out of the dark place I was in. The anxiety is still with me sometimes, but it doesn't envelop me as it once did. I am so thankful that I am well enough to help others, because there was a time when I didn't think it was possible to be normal again.

My first group was very healing for me personally, because no one showed up, but I was surprisingly okay with that. I am ready now, really ready, to put myself out there. I realize that it's possible that no one will show up again this week, but it doesn't mean that I'm going to give up! I know there are women out there who need someone to talk to, right at this very moment, and they are feeling stuck in a place that seems to have no way out. I want to tell my story and have those women realize that there is a way out, and that they will be normal and happy again. It is so possible.