I don't know why, but I just couldn't sleep any longer this morning. I woke up at 6AM and couldn't get back to sleep! It's probably better this way ... I am having a bit of alone time, which is unexpected and really really nice!
Solstice happens this evening ... technically tomorrow morning I guess. Perhaps the uneasiness I've been feeling is the shift of seasons. Or perhaps I am allowing myself to get anxious about Yule. It shouldn't be like this - this truly is my favourite time of the year. And this year I am especially excited because both my sisters, and my parents will be here! There is snow on the ground, and we're supposed to get more ... and my children are so excited. I should be too, but I'm not. I admit it, I am not excited.
I am feeling some pressure to make the perfect dinner, and that everyone will love their gifts, and that my kids won't get too wound up.
It will be good enough if we eat a meal together as a family.
It will be good enough if everyone is smiling.
It will be good enough if I live in the moment and enjoy the day!
Wow ... just saying it here relieves so much pressure for me. My mom has told me in the past: You don't have to be perfect, Nicole. I denied it to myself that I was aiming for perfection, but I'm realizing that she is right, I try way too hard to make things perfect. My new mantra "It is good enough". It is good enough.